Choices

In the past three weeks, we have been struggling as individuals and a family to grasp the information we were given in regard to our unborn son, Ryan. Words do not adequately describe the emotions you experience when you are informed that the child you are carrying, will not return to your home, but instead will be going to his eternal home. You ask "why" and get angry. You try to make sense of a situation without answers and you start figuring out how to prepare for your child's birth while also preparing for his death.

The doctors had informed us that we had choices to make in regard to the pregnancy due to the diagnosis we received. Without a lot of discussion, we knew our decision. We were going to continue the pregnancy as long as Ryan's heart was beating and he was not in distress. We are not praying for our child to be healed, though that miracle would be received wholeheartedly. We are simply praying for comfort for our family and mainly for Ryan. The miracle that we pray for is to have a moment with him, even if it is just a few minutes, at his birth. We are not sure at this time how likely it will be that he will be alive at birth, but that is the hope that I hold on to.

We are scheduled to see the perinatologist again on Tuesday and at that same appointment we will meet with a neonatologist to discuss the birth and how we would like it handled. On Wednesday, I will follow back up with my OB. I will try to post an update after those appointments.

To all of those who are including us in your prayers, thank you. We are overwhelming grateful for the support.